FMF: Waiting in Faith

Joining in for a 5 minute Friday free-write with Kate and the gang

Prompt of the week: WAIT


GO:

I can't wait!

I can't wait until I can feel this tiny baby moving and kicking and reassuring Mama that all is well.

I can't wait until this awkward little bump grows big enough that I look pregnant and not just bloated or fat.

I can't wait to find out if June Bug, Mikayla, and Selah are getting a baby brother, or another sister.

I can't wait to be waddling around big and pregnant, complaining about back aches and cankles.

I can't wait to have a baby shower and wash all the tiny precious onesies and sleepers and itty-bitty mittens and socks.

Most of all I can't wait until a doctor places a screaming bundle of life into my arms and gives congratulations instead of condolences.

In the meantime: faith, not fear. FAITH, not fear. That is my mantra for 2015, and I repeat it to myself every time the enemy creeps in and whispers that maybe I can't trust God because after all, didn't He let me down before?

In the waiting place, FAITH, not fear.

STOP

Five Minute Friday: Whisper

Prompt of the week for  minutes unedited writing: Whisper

GO:

I love the way God whispers in my life. Have you had this experience? Where it seems all the sermons you hear, all the devotionals you read, and all the testimonies of friends all seem to be sending the same message to your heart? It is times like these that I can feel the holy spirit moving the most.

Sometimes God shouts into our lives with one pivotal moment where the light-bulb goes on and we suddenly see truth from a new perspective and our lives will never be the same again. 

Other times He whispers. Quietly, persistently, gently whispering truth in our ear. And we say, "yes, God, I get it." And He whispers again, and you think, "Yes, I understand." And again you hear the whispering and if you are not careful you start to brush it off because you have heard it so many times from so many different places in so many different voices that you think it's old news. 

God's good news never grows old. Listen to the whispers. Hold them tight. Hide them in your heart.

I remember a time in college when I kept hearing sermons about sickness and death and pain. The topic kept coming up in school chapels, and devotionals I was reading. I even read several novels for enjoyment that touched on the same topic! 

And then BOOM. Out of no-where my father was diagnosed with kidney disease and my mother had cancer. I stood face-to-face with the possibility that death might take one, or both, of my parents. Suddenly all those whisperings came back to me, and were my anchor in the storm. They helped me remember that It Is Finished and death no longer has the last word.

Thankfully, after surgery the doctors discovered that the only cancerous cells in my mother had already been removed in the biopsy, and a willing friend was found who was a match and gave his kidney to my father. They are both still here to love on June-bug. 

Fast-forward to 2013. I always take notes in church, but I generally took notes on the bulletin which invariably ended up in the garbage. In November of 2013 I decided to start keeping the notes, so I got a notebook to take sermon notes in. (By the way, the one bulletin that "happened" to get stuck in between two books on a shelf instead of thrown away, was a sermon about Job's trials and God's sovereignty).

• December 8th the sermon was about God's purpose and plan.

• On December 15th, right after I found out I was pregnant with Mikayla, the pastor gave an incredible list of verses that are promises God gives to His people - I looked them all up and copied them into my notebook.

• On December 29th, the sermon title was: Is God Enough When I have Lost a Loved One?

• January 12th was about Jonah. One of the quotes I wrote down? "Run to Him and not from Him when troubles come."

• A follow-up on Jonah on January 26th, I have written down, "God can handle our anger. When you are angry, listen to others, express your emotions, trust God, and take Him at His word."

• March 1st, my aunt posted on Facebook about a free Kindle book about Romans 8 - I downloaded it and read through it over the next few weeks.

• March 16th, the sermon was all about our suffering and God's comfort.

• April 13th, Mikayla was stillborn.

• April 27th, the sermon was about the defeat of death. 

• June 24th, I downloaded another free Kindle book which I highly recommend:

•             A Place of Healing

• June 29th, the sermon was about walking in God's will.

• July 6th, I wept through most of the sermon about the beauty of heaven.

• July 13th, that very-difficult 3-month anniversary Sunday, I wrote down in my notes, "(Rev.1:4) is a reminder that we are not only saved by grace, but also kept by grace through times of trial, and peace comes as a result of that grace."

And I could go on and on about the little whispers of God's grace and comfort that He has injected into my daily living over the past year. All the little things that would have been easy to miss or dismiss or forget, but when all added together have been a powerful barge to keep me afloat in my sea of confusion and grief. 

I do not believe anything is a coincidence, and I know that God whispered each and every one of these truths into my life at the moments I needed them most. I am thankful that God prompted me to record them and keep them for when I am tempted to forget. And He keeps on whispering His words of love in my ear.

STOP.

Whoa. That was way more than five minutes, but it was worth it. What has God been whispering to you lately?