Missing Mikayla: 10 Things About Me

Wednesday, July 9, 2014

10 Things About Me - Grief Aside

Joining in the linky from http://stillstandingmag.com/2014/07/10-things-grief-aside-link/ tonight to remember that our grief does not define us.

10 things about me:

1. What are you reading right now? I have always been a voracious reader, and as a child often had 3-4 stories going at once. For a few years there I wasn't reading very much anymore except online, but now that I have a Kindle (and found Bookbub) I find myself in the middle of several books at once again :). Currently reading A Place of Healing by Joni Eareckson Tada, Apron Strings by Mary Morony, and just started The Stolen Kingdom by Ross Rosenfield.

2. Hobbies? Other than reading, I enjoy scrap-booking, card-making, sewing, pretty much anything craftsy

3. What is your favorite food? Ice Cream. Yes, I am serious. No, I won't choose a grown-up food.

4.What have you been procrastinating on? Oh my, what a question! What am I NOT procrastinating on? I guess the biggest right now would be cleaning out my closet that desperately needs it.

5. What is your perfect idea of a night out? Pizza and lemonade eaten on a blanket on the beach watching the sunset, followed by ice cream and a snuggle in a hammock.

6. What is your perfect idea of a night in? Curled up in a big comfy chair with a great book and good cup of coffee reading until 3am (after which I get to sleep in until 11) while the husband takes care of June Bug and all the housework. A girl can dream, right?

7. Any bad habits? See #4. Also, I spend too much time on the internet.

8. What is your favorite color? My favorite colors are green and blue. Blue like a summer sky, and deep dark green like Christmas trees.

9. What is a strange fact about you? If I total up all the houses/apartments/trailers/etc. I have lived in and divide it by my age, it would be less than one. My record for keeping one dwelling place is 3.5 years.

10. What are you passionate about? This is an easy one, and hopefully it has shown already on my blog. I am passionate about Jesus, and the hope and love that He has poured out into my life, and I am passionately pursuing more bravery to share Him more readily with others.

My hope is that my grief will not define me, but that I can say as Paul says, "For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain."

Still Standing in Memory of Mikayla Sophie, born still April 13, 2014

1 comment:

SM4:19 PM, July 10, 2014
Thank you for sharing! I found you through the link-up and had to visit.

I love that you fully own ice cream as your favorite food! No shame in that! :)
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Mikayla's Story

I found out I was pregnant in December of 2013. We told family at Christmas, and everyone was so excited, especially June Bug. She had been praying for a baby brother for about 2 years. Everything was great until at almost 15 weeks, I started bleeding. I was told it was due to a placenta previa. I was put on pelvic rest and told to take it easy.

Then at almost 19 weeks, I had 2 pretty big bleeding episodes, passed some huge blood clots, and apparently ruptured my membranes, because the scan they did the next morning showed almost no amniotic fluid. The doctors said I would most likely miscarry in the next 48 hours, and they might have to do surgery on me if they couldn't control the bleeding. I stayed in the hospital 4 days not even allowed to get out of bed. The doctors were surprised we made it that far, and let me go home on bed rest. Again all looked okay, and though I was still spotting, baby was still going strong and kicking. During this time we learned baby liked hot chocolate and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. My husband and daughter both got to feel kicks, and we were hopeful for a miracle.

At 21 weeks 5 days, I had an upset stomach after dinner. I thought it was something I ate, and after drinking some mint tea and lying down for a while I felt better. At 3am the next morning I woke up and was having strong contractions. We went to the ER, and called some friends to take our daughter.

The ultrasound showed no heartbeat. About 2 hours later our baby was born still on April 13.

I am still trying to sort out my emotions about it all. I am thankful that our little Mikayla Sophie (Who is like God in His wisdom?) never knew pain or suffering, but went from being enveloped in my motherly love in my womb, to being enveloped in God's fatherly love in His arms. I am thankful for those extra weeks I got to carry her and get to know her and feel her and shower her with love. And most of all I am thankful for the comfort that comes from knowing I will see my Mikayla again. That though I am missing her now, it is only temporary, and my current trials are not even worth comparing to the future glory that will be revealed! The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord!