Tuesday, May 20, 2014

I had my follow-up appointment today.

I nearly had a panic attack in the waiting room. Pregnant women everywhere.Pictures of babies on the walls. Tiny baby girl in pink frilly stroller coming with Mom to postpartum check.

That should be me. I should be 27 weeks and starting to waddle. Not empty and hunched beneath the weight of my grief.

I want to scream at them. I want to scream at it all.

No fair.

And now no answers. No reasons. No-thing we can do next time to reduce the chances of the unthinkable happening to us again. No-where to place the blame except "these things happen."

My husband is angry, but I'm too overwhelmed to be angry.

He wants answers. I just want my baby back.

Praying for peace in my heart. Praying for strength to face tomorrow.

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